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Paruresis: The Shy Bladder Syndrome

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an old time who's had shy bladder for over 30 yrs. [Mar. 28th, 2005|09:37 am]
Paruresis: The Shy Bladder Syndrome


[mood |determined]
[music |fish tank bubbles]

Female age 48. I've suffered from paurasis for years. Back when I started having problelms there was no name for it and I don't even think the docs. knew anything about it. I went for medical attention when I was no longer able to pee even in my own home. I am what they call a severe case. I was taught to do self urinary catherization for it. I never knew there were other people with this problem till this past year. When my high school aged daughter started telling me should could not pee in public or at school and was often in severe pain on feild trips I cam clean with my daughters about my own history with not being able to pee myself and my need to stay in my saftey zone all these years as well as that I have to preform self cath when necessary. I had spent all these years thinking I was some kind of mental freak a nd the only one. Well I'm not and I feel so much better now that its not just my "ugly discusting dirty secret". It's just a part of me and I pray that one day it will be a public talked about subject so that the proper privacy bathrooms are available for all someday. I fear my daughter will have problems when she goes off to college. I have told her that she doesn't need to suffer...she can train for self catherization if it becomes necessary. I hope she gets better on her own and that never becomes necessary for her. Any one want to talk about an of this and the problem you may suffer...write to me as I am an old timer with this and the issues that can go with it. shame and fear of people knowing, is still and issue for me but at least I know I'm not the only one now and my girls still love me even though they know their mom has some severe social issues. Best to all of you. love Kathy

[User Picture]From: deeplyunhip
2005-03-28 05:47 pm (UTC)
Well it's definitely good to see that you can live a normal life despite this. I've had a lot of problems with this in college, especially because a lot of people were convinced that it was my fault that I didn't take medication for this. Maybe that's because there isn't a medication that cures paruresis! Oy. Anyway, I probably should learn self-catherization but I'm kind of on the squeamish side so I've been avoiding even figuring out what that really entails. But if it really always works, I guess I really should attempt learning, and hopefully will be able to do it without making myself sick.

I bet a lot more people have this problem but are not open to discussing it with others, because bathroom issues are such private things. You know, no one is fond of discussing their diarrhea, lol. But this is a serious problem that makes life a lot more difficult for a lot of people and I think that the more people are who are open about it contribute to a chance for there being more understanding and treatment regarding it.

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[User Picture]From: saint_katherine
2005-03-30 02:48 pm (UTC)

hi kim

sure am glad you have been able to talk about your problem. I kept it a secret for many many years. Too many! You were wrong though in that I atleast lead a normal life. Not true. I have stayed at home, never worked, and not much of a social life. I've lived in fear of people finding out and I still do other than my children knowing now. But yes I do have three beautiful daughters, and I have had more than my share of relationships (failed) but yes there is so much more you can do if you don't have to suffer. I would reccomend you only learn to cath if you cannot go on your own in many cases and after talking to your doctor about your problem. It's not hard to do but it takes a bit of practice to get fast at it. I say that without it I would probably never leave the housee and that is no life at all. good luck to you. kathy
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From: (Anonymous)
2005-04-15 08:11 pm (UTC)

Re: hi kim

I've had this same problem for years, and my parents took me to a physical theripist who worked with biofeed back equipment(I think that was what it was called) and some yoga type exercises that focused on the pelvic floor muscle to help me, so that i went from only being able to use the bathroom at my house to using public bathrooms as well. I never learned to self cath b/c my doctor felt that should be a last resort.
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